How Money Mentoring Can Save Your Marriage

Most couples don’t realise they’re on different financial pages until something small tips everything sideways.

A sarcastic comment about spending.

A bill arriving earlier than expected.

One partner feeling calm while the other feels like the sky is falling.

A FIFO swing that throws the rhythm out.

A tradie invoice paid late.

A quiet week that hits harder than it should.

It’s not usually one big moment that will kick off the emotional response. It’s dozens of tiny ones. Suddenly you’re both looking at the same bank account but somehow, you're seeing completely different things.

Finances Affect Marriages

When you sit with couples long enough, you start to see a pattern. I love talking to people about money, and I've had thousands of conversations and filed thousands of tax returns. 

It’s never about the money.

It’s about:

• one partner carrying the mental load while the other is exhausted from work (distraction)

• two different upbringings shaping two different sets of beliefs (misunderstandings)

• one person seeking safety while the other seeks freedom (competing ambitions) 

• someone trying to “hold it all together” while the other tries not to rock the boat (emotional labour imbalance) 

Sometimes it causes fights. Sometimes it's worse. No fights. No dramatic moment. There's… distance.

One person avoids the money conversations because it feels stressful. The other avoids speaking up because they don’t want to sound controlling. Everyone is acting from positions of fear, worry and lack.

Money becomes a topic where you both walk on eggshells, however this avoidance tactic will mean it starts to show up in other places, like affecting your sleep, connection, intimacy, patience, stress levels, and energy.

The Moment Things Begin To Shift

A spreadsheet is not the answer. The problems we're talking about here are much deeper than this, and it's often not reflected in the finances at all.

Most people forget that they're not alone. They are not alone when creating a life together, and so the tools to create that life need to be shared too. Such as finances, goals, communication, systems for getting those  goals... it all takes work, but work with someone you love. 

The shift happens the moment you remember you're on the same team.

Why Couples Love My Money Mentoring

I love a good chat about money. It's endlessly fascinating, and it's so important to our lives and involves so many emotions. 

I'm experienced at talking about all of the things about money. I've helped couples avoid divorces, bankruptcy, and debts. I've helped smooth fights, build communication bridges, and create simple ways to keep households in order.

And because I am a judgment-free third opinion with a tonne of experience, my delight at helping really shines through. I'm here because I want to be, because I want to help YOU get the things you want in life. I want you to see that you can too! 

Talking about things is shining a light into the un-spoken whispers of your money beliefs, your family's money beliefs and experiences, and your generational history of money and money attitudes. It's a lot to carry for a buck or two, but when we recognise that the discussions about money are RARELY about the money itself, we're all free to talk more openly about what's really bothering us. 

Turn "you spend too much" into "I don't know what's going on with our finances and it scares me." 

Make "You never help with bills" become "I didn't realise you were stressed about this. How can I help?"

Let go of "I'm sick of doing this alone" and embrace "I'm here. I'm present. What can I do?" 

Being on different pages doesn’t mean something is wrong with your relationship. It simply means life has been loud, complicated, and demanding, and you’ve probably been surviving instead of connecting.

I'm here to help you get back on track, and create new ways to talk to your partner and family about money. Money doesn't have to be this big taboo subject. Treating it as taboo means no one gets what they want! 

Check out my support options here for more info: 

https://intentionalmoney.com.au/couples-money-mentoring